Where has 2010 gone already??
I see the last I was here I was frustrated with the husband. Well, on our anniversary, I called and made arrangements for the two of us to spend 2 nights away from the kids. We dropped the girls off at grandparents at 9:30 pm and the next 2 nights were all ours - uninterrupted. It was fabulous and well needed. Our time alone was way overdue. Prior to that our only time without the girls was military functions where the night consisted of smiling and nodding.
Shortly after our rendezvous - I learned that a young couple I know were separated. That the husband had had an affair and didn't feel bad about it at all. They are separated - no divorce is desired. He is parting like a rock star and she is waiting. Shortly after that my life time friend's husband told her one morning that he didn't like her anymore and he wanted a divorce - after 21 years!!! They have since started thinking clearly and are doing better. THEN another couple we went to church with are also getting divorced. She had an affair. He attempted to shoot himself, the gun misfired, and SHE gets to play the victim. WTH? Not many know about her affair - but all know about his misfortune. The news of the adultery really upset me. It wasn't happening to me, and I do not feel threatened, but it is one of those things that preys on insecurities.
Those that commit adultery do not realize the impact that it has. Not only have you misled your spouse, but those that you know. The last person I mentioned - her friends had NO idea. She knew that her husband was depressed and talked about suicide, and she told no one.
Marriage is not something I take lightly. Love is a choice. You choose to love someone. Sometimes Husband really pushes my buttons - not in a good way - but, no matter, I love him. I may not be particularly fond of him at the moment, but I choose to love him. I know that I am not perfect. (GASP!!) We made a commitment. A covenant, to each other and to God, that we would be true to one another. Forever. I am so thankful, that as my heart broke for my friends, that my man was compassionate and took my hand, reminding me that that was THEM, not US. Divorce is not an option for us. We are a team and teams stick together.
Had Husband and I not had that time alone together, that time to talk about nothing but US, about where we were headed, dreams, goals... to laugh, to simply sit in silence, to hold hands, sleep in, and enjoy all that being a married couple was about... had we not had those two nights, the last few months would have driven a deeper wedge between us. Co-existing is not healthy. After 13 years, we are on the same page and when one of us starts to fall off course - the other is there to pull them back.
I love my man. I am just crazy mad about my man. I hope that my children can be as blessed as I am to marry a man half as amazing as he is.
Night all!
