Well, Easter break was nice. Yes I know - it's called Spring break because we don't want to offend anyone who may not celebrate Easter - but I still call it Easter break. Especially when it falls around... you know... Easter.
My mother came to visit us for the first time in 6 years. It was interesting and I'm glad that we made it through. Then the Husband took off the latter part of the week. That was great. We had thought about some day trips - but after our visitor, it was nice to just hang out around the house as a family and enjoy the beautiful weather. Soon it will be to hot to sit on our porch all day long. We had fun playing games with the kids, playing legos, painting, planting flowers, grilling, painting, and well more painting. I took the chance to make some crafty things that my friend Kim had sent me the 'how to' links for. Very therapeutic.
The Saturday before Easter, our neighbors (which I have mentioned before) had an egg hunt. We reluctantly went. Their kid is fine, definitely an only child, but our girls get along. The mom is always weird around me. I don't really get it. When the hunt was over - the women went into the living room to do whatever it is they do - apparently this meant that mom and other lady would talk about their plans together and people only they knew. I am certain in some etiquette book somewhere it says when you are among people that are not in your common circle of friends - you save your private conversations for later. SO - I politely excused myself, not that I think they noticed - chatted with the men folk about power washing decks - and then we left.
This has been a hard venue to break into. The non military crowd. Women should have a common bond - just because we are women. There are so many levels to connect. Even if you are not the bestest of friends - you should have SOMETHING that you can talk about. Kids, husbands, cooking, shopping, even the weather if you have nothing else!
It seems that some are so concerned with making ourselves out to be so much better than everyone else - that instead we make ourselves out to be less. There was a time in my life that I would have felt inferior. I immediately would have suffered thinking that I was dirt - that there was something wrong with me - why wouldn't they want to be my friend? I still think that to a level -I think a healthy level. I can not change who I am. I am in a good place. I am too old to worry about pleasing everyone else and worrying about what others think of me.
Don't misunderstand - I don't want to be arrogant - thinking myself better. I have pounds to get rid of, behind on my laundry and a dirty house. But I do have to realize that in my life journey as a military wife - I have met some amazing women. I have learned to move my family every 2 years and set up a home regardless. I have the debt to prove it. I take comfort in knowing that my girls are healthy and they know they are loved unconditionally. I have a husband who I am crazy about and he wants to be home with his family. These are the things that are true - these are the things that I am told to focus on. The "what ifs", the "should I"... no more. They do nothing more than break down the very core of who we are.
Women are complicated. They are just plain crazy at times. When I meet these women - I have to remember to smile - chuckle softly to myself and be thankful for my friends that are just as normal as I am.
Thanks friends! I miss you all terribly!!!
Oh so beautifully said!! Amen!!
ReplyDeleteWoman are awful sometimes. I'd much rather hang with men at parties because they are so much less ...womany. What is that, anyway? Catty, maybe? Judgmental? I'd hate us if I didn't love us so much.
Because when you find a good one... they are loyal and sympathetic and AMAZING in how they can juggle everything. Moving is an example of that. Men just pack the suitcase they need to get to the next spot and unpack it when they get there and think, "What's so hard about that?" then they go to work.
Women have to pack the rest of the house, remember what to leave out for the kids, mark it all so you can find it, organize the movers, deal with the breakage factor, unpack, rearrange, figure out how to get what you had in your old house to look good in the new one, settle the kids in so they feel solid and protected and not so lonely, deal with the emotional baggage of leaving behind old friends and figuring out how to make new ones on nothing more than the similarity of having kids and living in the same place. Women have to find new shopping places and wander until they get the feel of the layout, and reconfigure meals you've made the past three years to fit into the ingredients available at the new home.Find new schools, deal with new teachers, find new doctors and churches and activities for the kids.
You know...it's no wonder we're crazy. :)
Sometimes the only thing that keeps me happy where I am is the knowing so utterly that this is where God wanted us.
Sooo true! That is what I hold on to with every assignment. "This is where we are meant to be"... but I still cry "WHY!?!?!"
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